Pivital points...

I've often said that there's nothing so powerful as recalling a negative emotion. If I took the time to read back through all my blogs I'd guess that I've even written it a time or two, because it is a truism that I have enjoyed quoting. This morning I realized that I am wrong. While it is true that negative emotions can be incredibly powerful, and can impact our memories fror years to come, it is not true that they are the most powerful.

This morning in church, the message was about growth, and how God will "prune" us to develop the character and the person he wants us to be. One point of the message was how we face growth at "pivital points" in our lives, usually those times we find ourselves despairing in one of life's valleys. As I sat there and listened I recalled a pivital point in my life, a time I was mired deep in one of those valleys, and the power of those negative emotions welled my eyes with tears as I sat there.

I have three children today, two sons, 27 and 24, and a daughter 21. Some twenty-three years ago I had another daughter who, at 8 1/2 months in the womb, turned and strangled on her umbilical cord. I can still remember, as vividly as if it were yesterday, inducing labor and delivering a beautiful baby girl. As I held that lifeless form of my beautiful baby daughter the pain, the grief so overwhelmed my broken heart. Later, I found myself sitting alone in one of the waiting rooms in the hospital and I recall praying, "God, I have loved and follwed you; how can you take my baby girl, something so precious, so wonderful to me?" And He answered my heart, so clearly that I remember opening my eyes and looking around, to see where the voice came from. He said,"You lost a child you never knew; I lost my son whom I knew forever." And as I sat there I felt the Father, greiving with me; two fathers sharing unbearabble pain together. In that moment, that experience, I knew the awesome presence of God, and comfort and peace that surpasses all understanding. In my lowest moment God was there, and holding me close to His heart, safe in his hand. That day I learned that there is something that is far more powerful than a negative emotion- it is the comfort and security of the Father. It's just taken me twenty-some years to realize it.

Today's lesson is this: You can't experience and appreciate God's comfort without first experiencing pain... Food for thought...