A Loner no longer...

I've been a loner most of my life. It was almost with a convoluted sense of pride that I felt I didn't need anyone, that I could stand alone. But these last few years, as I've begun to experience the joy of community with others it has become apparent to me how flawed my earlier thinking was. Now I've learned that I don't necessarily need others, but as I began to experience the joys and benefits of community I began to want it. Then, as the desire to meet that want grows, I've discovered that I do need others... How's that for circuitous linear thinking?

So what has community done for me? For starters, I've come to enjoy the gift of giving, and that is not something a loner often experiences... I love to see a need and just meet it; I've learned the greatest blessings come when giving with no thought or expectation of return. Sometimes I might be taken advantage of, however, if I know going in that the possibility exists, am I really? Sure, I've been criticized for being too free with my resources, but my standard I measure my action by is, if Jesus were here what would he do, or what would he desire me to do? Often the action is a no-brainer.

Another blessing of community is the friendships themselves. Realizing that I truly like people and can feel their honest liking for me is really incredible. Actually missing them when apart, and realizing they've missed me too, by their response when reunited is uniquely fulfilling. Hearing, "I missed you", and feeling actual joy at seeing them is something a loner doesn't often experience...

People and relationships can be work for me, can be taxing. One thing I didn't experience very often as a loner was the disappointment that ultimately comes in relationships, for we are all human, and destined to fail, no matter how hard we try. When I was alone people didn't disappoint, for I didn't expect anything. As a member of community I've found that disappointment is inevitable, but it is my response that is important. I can choose to be adversely affected, withdraw and be disappointed, or I can choose to extend grace, to be intentional in preserving the sanctity of the relationship... Community done right teaches grace, fellowship, and generousity...