Relational Success...

I'm nearing sixty years old, and I'd like to believe I've learned a little along my life's journey. If I could only pass on one tidbit of information to my children, and even those close to me it would be this:
Learn to be successful in your relationships.
At the end of your life "things" won't matter one iota. New cars, a fancy house, boats, motorcycles, any kind of "toys" we tend to want to collect won't comfort you or keep you warm. Personal relationships will be the source of your comfort- whether it be your spouse, children, siblings, or friends and relatives. Memories will be a source of comfort- memories of good times with others, not things. And the most important aspect of developing successful relationships is learning the art of compromise.

Within the context of a relationship we often find that our idea of doing something varies from our counterpart in the relationship. Ideally the we should talk it out and reach a compromise that both sides find palatable, and move forward accordingly. Yet if one insists on doing it his way, and makes a compelling argument for his desire to do it his way, he isn't wrong- nor is his friend- for they each have their own perspectives, and differing perspectives doesn't make one right and one wrong. It just means there are different ways to accomplish the same goal.
Now, if a compromise isn't reached, then one side will have to give in or the relationship reaches a loggerhead. So what happens to the side that gives in? Even if they "bury" it, there's resentment. One party will have a good measure of the joy they should experience together tarnished by the fact that they "caved" in to the other's will- usually under the pretext of trying to keep the peace, yet in the end they are left with deep seated resentment. Going forward that will create a wall, or a stumbling point in the relationship because they won't want to cave again- even though they may never say a word. It creates an animosity, and creates distance between the two.
But what happens if a compromise is reached? Neither side may get 100% of what they wanted, but both sides get something, and that allows both to feel that they're important, that their desires have merit and consideration within the relationship. Even if one side only gets 10%, or 20% of what they wanted they will still appreciate the gesture and the compromise. Now in this example I've been using one side clearly gets more, but both sides come out winners. It's all about being willing to compromise...
On a personal note, I've had to learn this lesson, and it pains me to admit it took far longer than I wish, for I am very much like that one who can make the compelling argument, who could convince others to do it "my way",  You see, often times my intelligence derailed my relational success. So what if  I do something less efficiently, if it means making someone I care about happy? Do I need to be right, or do I need to be considerate? Most of the time it is impossible to be both. I've learned it's far better to be considerate. I hope it is a lesson my kids and grandkids learn much quicker than I did. Perhaps they won't be as relationally challenged as their Papa...

Food for thought...

Where Does God Come From?

I am often amazed at how our finite minds try to tackle infinite concepts. God, in His very nature, is infinite, and we are unable to even begin to comprehend Him, aside from those attributes that He chooses to share with us through his Word, the Bible...And yet, people still ask questions like, "If God can do anything then can He make a rock so heavy that He can't lift it?" And the answer, of course, is yes. My God, the Infinite Creator of our universe, can certainly do something so mundane. Don't ask me how, for my finite mind cannot grasp it, but because He can do anything then that is certainly within the scope of His power. Recently I watched an interview of a man, (who I cannot remember his name so as to give him proper credit for his answer), and one panel member asked him, "Where God comes from?" Now I wish I could give his answer verbatim, but I cannot, so the gist of the answer will have to do.
He started out by saying that we live on a continuum, and thus are bound by time, space, and matter. These things define our existence. God however, is not bound by any of these things, for He exists outside our continuum, and indeed created them. He is not bound by them, and if He were, he would be finite also, and certainly not worthy of our worship. Then he explained what, when, and where God created the continuum that defines our existence. The what (matter), the when (time), and the where (space) are all found in what he called God's trilogy of trilogies
Let's look at the very first words God gave us in His Word. The first ten verses of Genesis chapter one read, "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth". When? In the beginning, the start of time, which consists of past, present, and future-one trilogy. Where? The heavens- defined by specific length, and depth, and width- the second trilogy. And What? The earth, consisting of solids, liquids, and gases- God's third trilogy.
As Creator, God is clearly outside theses boundaries that He created, much like a parents are outside the boundaries they create for their children. Children may not understand their boundaries, and often test them, but a good parent knows they are there for the protection and well-being of the child.In the exact same way our Heavenly Father does not explain all to us, but we can rest in the assurance that He has only our best interests at heart. If we could explain God then there would be no mystery to Him, no reason for our adoration and worship. Someday, for those who believe in Him, and call Son Jesus Christ their Lord and Savior, someday  the Apostle Paul tells us we will know fully, even as we are fully known. Now we see in part, and prophesy in part, but one day we shall see clearly, and understand fully this Infinite Creator, but only after the shackles have been removed from our finite minds.
My response to those who try to think up paradoxes and contradictory puzzles and statements to try and trip up believers, I say to you this- try and picture in your mind complete nothingness- the total absence of everything. If you can do that I can answer any and all questions you have pertaining to God. (However it is impossible, for even a vacuum is "something", a void is still space). You see, absolute nothingness is an infinite concept, one which our finite brains try to understand, but can only come up lacking, for we are shacked by our finite limitations...So one day, when God had healed this broken creation and believers share in eternity with the Uncreated, we will have our answers. Until then, God comes from that which no man can understand, before the constraints of time and forever more to be.
Food for thought...