A Time of Thanksgiving...

As another Thanksgiving Day comes to a close I reflect on that which I am thankful for this past year. There's been so much to be thankful for, yet the most important thing, I think, has been a more constant realization, or awareness, that I am man and God is God. I think that all too often we get caught up in life, in ourselves, and forget that we are merely man; flawed, sinful, twisted, and weak. We look only to ourselves, at ourselves, or compare ourselves to other men and get a demented view of who we really are. We are man- we are faulted and weak, and viewed next to the awesome perfection of God we are shamed and laid bare in our shortcomings. Yet God is God- he is and has always been love, always forgiveness, always mercy. He doesn't judge us with the same small-mindeness that so exemplifies our treatment of each other, rather he is perfect in his response to us. And then, when we realize our place in the relationship, when we humble ourselves before Him, when we choose him over ourselves, then the relationship is righted and restored. It is our confession that we are man that allows his love and forgiveness to freely flow, and that realization is what I am most thankful for this year. As Jonah so eloquently put it, "Those who cling to worthless idols (ie. anything that seperates us from God) forfeits the grace that could be theirs" (2:9). Thank-you Father, for your grace and mercy, for loving such a man as me. Your grace is sufficient for me. Amen.

When God Speaks...

I don't think we expect God to directly speak to us today, at least not like He did to people in the Bible... For example, I think of Samuel, and how God called him, and wonder why we don't hear God's voice like that today... Perhaps it's because we're too busy, or our lives too loud to listen...
I know God still speaks today; I think we don't hear about it because we're afraid of what others may think of us if we share... I will share a time I heard God's voice.
Perhaps the darkest moment in my life was almost twenty-one years ago now. I lost a child, a daughter, in the final month of her pregnancy. I remember holding the lifeless form of my daughter, so beautifully formed, so tragically taken. I remember after they took my daughter away, and her mother lay sedated and asleep, I sat all alone in the waiting room, alone with God and my thoughts. I remember so clearly praying, "God, how could you allow this to happen? What good can possibly come out of this?" Just as clearly as if He were standing in the room I heard Him speak (indeed, I opened my eyes and looked around to see who spoke, it was that clear)... He said, "You lost a child who you never knew; I lost my son who I knew forever". It was in that moment I knew God grieved with me; two fathers grieving the loss of their children together, and all the pain and heartache that went with that experience. At this, the lowest point of my life, I never felt closer to my God, the Father, than I did right then. That is the graciousness of God- that in the depth of the valley of despair He is there, and He is real, and He wraps his arms around me and carries me through. My greatest spiritual blessing happened at my darkest hour. That is the goodness of God. Thank-you Father for allowing me to be quiet and hear your voice, to understand your words, through the Sons of Korah, "Be still, and know that I am God". I know God speaks today; are we strong enough, bold enough to listen?