Relationships- Sometimes it's All About Timing

I've often said that relationships can be difficult, and for a variety of factors. Sometimes relationships have run their course, the shared desire to make one work is gone, or perhaps distance has strained it, or one side has allowed the relationship to become inequitable in an unhealthy way. There are many other factors that could lead to the termination of a relationship, but what affects the beginning of a new relationship?
One of the most damaging things to the life of a new relationship is wrong timing. If one party is not really ready to enter in then the relationship could be in trouble. Let's say, for example, that I was just in a long-term relationship- one that I invested several years in- and at the end I was the one who decided to walk away. I still need time to grieve over the loss of what was a very prominent part of my life. I am not ready to just start pursuing  a new relationship. And then there's my ex-partner, who may still desire to try and fix the dysfunctional relationship, so there will be attempts to talk, to reconcile, before final acceptance is achieved-if ever.
My first relationship after my divorce was with a woman who divorced her husband, despite his desire to try and make their marriage work. She was done, but he wasn't. During our four-year off-and-on relationship he was constantly in the picture, for she continually allowed him to do work around the house, build her a deck, et al., because he desired to be close and she was willing to use him. It caused a serious strain on our relationship. When it comes to romantic relationships one needs to be finalized- on both sides- before beginning a new one if one wants a chance at optimal success.
If you don't allow time for healing then what does that do to your new beau? He or she becomes a "rebound" relationship, a filler that helps alleviate the pain and aid in the finality of the previous one. Now, it's possible that a relationship with this beginning can survive, but it causes unease for the new beau. (Add to that the game-playing that seems to permeate the dating scene nowadays and it's a wonder we have healthy relationships at all today).
Personally, I have become accustomed to being alone, and am perfectly comfortable being single. Being single is not a sickness. Yet there are times I remember the beauty of a good and healthy relationship- the sharing, the love, the memories. I would welcome being in relationship again, but I will refuse to play the stupid dating games. I'm too old for that. I don't want to be a rebound, I don't want to be used to teach someone a lesson. I want to pour love and attention out on someone special, and have that love reciprocated. I want to know what my mate expects, what they want in a relationship. I have so much to offer, but I need to know their expectations to see if it's viably possible to achieve. I am willing to make that monetary commitment to a relationship, and the time commitment that relationships require- most are willing to do these- but I am also willing to make that emotional commitment, which is laying my heart out there to be vulnerable to hurt and devastation if my mate chooses not to protect it. Being emotionally available is perhaps the most difficult element of new relationships.
So timing is important if we want optimal success. I know a woman, a beautiful woman, inside and out, and was attracted to her from our first meeting some several years ago. At that time she was engaged in a long-term relationship, which recently she left. Now the temptation is to move in and sweep her off her feet with romance and attention, but that's not healthy for her or me. I'm sure there will be residual contact and effects from her last relationship that need time to be dealt with. I'm sure that she needs to lay that relationship to rest, and that takes some time. she needs to recover emotionally so she'll be able to give her best to the next relationship. Now I risk losing the opportunity to ever develop a relationship with her, to her old beau or another new one, by allowing her time to heal, especially if she wants to move forward immediately- but I only want the best- for her and for me, for we deserve nothing less. Sometimes it's all about timing.
Food for thought...